Glass
by TehOzzords
Summary: A little mucking about goes horribly wrong... BlackadderxDarling fic, contains blood and stuff.


**Rating:** PG-13?

**Author:** Teh Ozza

I like slash. Slash, slash, slash. Please don't punish me.

* * *

Darling leant back in his seat, unfastening the top button of his shirt to relieve his throat. 

After finally managing to work his way through the massive pile of paperwork Melchett had unloaded on him, he felt like he could kick back for a while. Pouring himself a drink, he put his feet up on the desk and let his head fall back. Relaxation time for Darling was a rare occurrence, considering how the general always liked to keep him busy.

Without warning, Blackadder swung the doors open and strode in, letting them slam shut behind him. Darling looked up sharply, causing his neck to make a sickly, dull cracking sound.

"Darling, have you seen- … oh. Oh, well, now… What's going on here, then?"

Darling struggled to sit up, a hand on his now pain-filled neck.

"Oh, Blackadder, I just…" He choked, labouring to think of an explanation.

"No, no, Darling, I see what's going on… Slacking, eh?"  
"N-no, I was- Hey!"

Blackadder, who had put his hat down on the desk, had picked up the bottle and was reading the label.

"Well, Darling, you really have surprised me. I always took you for a tonic water man. I never saw you as the type to sustain alcohol… well, not like a REAL man would…"

Darling twitched severely, trying to crick his neck back into place.

"Blackadder, just put it down and get out!"

"That's not very hospitable, now, is it? Are you not even going to offer me a drink?"

Darling gave up on trying to regain his body's equilibrium and moved around the desk, reaching out to try and take the bottle from him.

"Ah, ah, Darling, don't snatch…" Said Blackadder, smirking.

Darling grabbed for the bottle again, but missed.

"Blackadder! Just stop that!"

Blackadder held the bottle behind his back in one hand, putting the other on Darling's chest in order to push him away. Getting more and more frustrated, Darling clawed at Blackadder's arm, trying to get at him, but Edmund just laughed, which made the situation worse. Darling smashed his hand away, allowing him to step into the other man, straining to reach behind his back.

This childish behaviour was getting Darling really heated up. He knew that Blackadder was making him look foolish as he leant on his chest, trying to get his arms around him to grab the bottle.

Blackadder switched tactics and instead held the bottle over his own head, a little further behind him in an effort to make Kevin jump at it for his amusement. Darling, however, refused to play this game and instead grabbed at his sleeve, attempting to pull his arm down. Blackadder put his other arm across Darling's chest and pushed him back as his elbow gave way, leaving him to hold out the bottle to his side again. They stumbled backwards and Darling wrapped his foot around Blackadder's ankle. Edmund tripped and fell back, hitting the floor hard.

The bottle in his hand shattered as he landed and shards of glass were strewn across the carpet.

"Bugger!"

He sat up, clutching his hand.

The adrenaline rush was over almost instantly, as reality fell back into place and Darling realised what had happened. He knelt beside him to get a better look at his hand.

Blackadder's palm was covered in blood and a number of large pieces of glass were protruding from it.

"Wh-what should I do?" Kevin asked, now shaking a little in shock.

"Pull them out, you idiot!" He snarled through gritted teeth.

"Wh-what?"  
"JUST DO IT!"

Darling put a hand under his to hold it still and clumsily began to remove the largest piece of glass. It wasn't stabbed in as deep as he had expected, but he felt sick as he heard Blackadder hiss in pain.

"Oh my God, I'm so, so sorry…" He said, moving onto the next fragment.

"Just get them out…"  
As Darling removed the glass, he began to feel his face becoming hotter and hotter. Behind his eyes were burning as tears welled up, but he just scrubbed at them with his sleeve and returned to work.

After what seemed like an eternity, Blackadder's hand was shard-free.

They looked at each other properly for the first time since the accident.

Edmund was ghostly pale and sweating a little, whilst Kevin was oddly pink and tear-stained. They were both breathing heavily and looked quite sickened.

"Shouldn't you… go to the field hospital?" Said Darling finally.

"No… It's not worth it. It's only a minor injury."

"Minor? B-but you're bleeding!"

"It's minor compared to a bullet wound though, isn't it?" Said Blackadder, sounding quite annoyed.

"Sorry."  
"Darling, why are you apologising?"  
Darling didn't reply, instead trying to change the subject.

"I'll get the First Aid kit," he said, wiping his forehand with the back of a bloody hand before getting up and going over to the desk. Underneath it was a box of his emergency medical supplies, which he kept there mainly out of paranoia, but which suddenly seemed very appropriate. He knelt back down beside Blackadder, now with the box, and wiped up some of the blood that was dripping down his wrist before beginning to clean the wound.

Though it stung, Edmund failed to acknowledge the pain as he stared at Darling's face.

A few more tears ran over his cheeks and fell from his chin. One hit Blackadder's thumb, making him suddenly feel responsible for the man's distress.

As Darling reached over for the bandages, he put his good hand on Kevin's face, turning it toward his.

"What?" He asked quietly, confused.

Blackadder leant over and kissed him, just by the side of his mouth, very softly.

Darling froze, his chest suddenly extremely tight.

Blackadder had kissed him? _Him_? That wasn't right. That couldn't be right. And yet it was, and… it felt amazing.

Edmund pulled away and Darling, who had suddenly felt in an odd, dream-like state, snapped back to full consciousness.

" … Wh-what was that for?"  
Blackadder smiled.

"Are you going to bandage my hand up or are you waiting for gangrene to set in?"  
"Sorry…"  
"Darling, I wish you would stop apologising. You have no reason to."  
"Yes, I do," Kevin sighed, wrapping his hand. "It was my fault you fell, I tripped you up… Oh God, I just feel so guilty..."

"It's wasn't your fault at ALL," said Edmund, putting his hand on Darling's. "I was being an arse and got myself hurt, it's my own bloody fault."  
Darling bit his lip and nodded, trying not to cry again.

Looking over to the box, he saw there were no pins, so struggled to remove the safety pin that held his tie in place, before using it to secure the bandage.

"I hate you, Blackadder," he mumbled, welling up.

"Oh, Kevin…" He smiled and put an arm around Darling as he began to cry, keeping his hand palm-up as to avoid any friction that may damage it more. "You stupid prat."

Darling laughed tearfully, rubbing his cheek into the material of Edmund's jacket, and put his arms around his waist.

"Why get yourself all worked up over me?" He asked, putting his good hand on Darling's knee.

"I just… I was-… I was worried about you."

"Why? I'm a complete bastard."  
"Yes, but… well, so am I."

"A bastard wouldn't have helped me. He wouldn't have taken the broken glass out of my cut, he wouldn't have sterilised it and he certainly wouldn't have bandaged it and sacrificed his only safety pin to hold it in place."

"Thank you, Edmund…" He sat up and wiped his dripping face, before managing a damp smile.

They kissed. It was a soft, gentle caress, which then deepened a little as they moved closer.

They parted, keeping their faces close.

"I should really clear up the rest of that glass, you know…"

"I'll help."  
"Edmund, you don't have to-"  
"No, please. I want to." They got on their knees and he started to gather up the pieces. " It was me that broke the damn thing, I should take some responsibility, at least."

" … Sorry."  
"What did I tell you about apologising for nothing? Stop it!"  
"Sorry…"  
Blackadder glowered at him.

"Sorry. Oh, I did it again, sorry! Sorry, sorry! Sorry!"

"Look, Darling, just shut up, alright?"

They continued to clear up the glass in silence.

"You're an idiot, did you know that?"  
"Yes, yes…" Sighed Darling. "I know…"  
"It's quite endearing."  
"Thanks…"


End file.
